Jappier's Spoken English

In Tamilnadu, there is a well known person by name, Mr. Jeppier, Chairman of
Sathyabama deemed university and some more self financing colleges, always
speaks in English. That college students have collected & published a book
by name "Jappier's Spoken English"

... Njoy ...........with his..............English..............

Now, here are some classic English sentences from the great "Jappier's
Spoken English"

# At the ground:

All of you stand in a straight circle.
There is no wind in the balloon.
The girl with the mirror please comes her...{Means: girl with specs please
come here).

# To a boy, angrily:

I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk?

# While punishing students:

You, rotate the ground four times...
You, go and understand the tree...
You three of you stand together separately.
Why are you late say YES or NO .....(?)
# While addressing students about Dress Code: (he is very strict abt this )

Every body should wear dress to college
Boys no proplum
Girls are pig proplum . (pig=big)
Girls should wear only slawar no nitee.
Girls should not wear T sirt ,U shirt,V shirt.. but if you want to wear ....
remove it when inside the campus and put it oout side the campus

# Sir at his best:

Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance, he happened to see one
of our boys at the theatre, though the boy did no t see them.
So the next day at s school... (to that boy) "Yesterday I saw you
WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema Theatre"

# Sir at his best inside the Class room:

Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in.
Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in.
Cut an apple into two halves I will take the bigger half.
Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal JUST PASSED AWAY in the corridor
You, meet me behind the class. (Meaning AFTER the class..)
This one is cool >> "Both of u three get out of the class."
Close the doors of the windows please. I have winter in my nose today...
Take Copper Wire of any metal especially of Silver.....
Take 5 cm wire of any length....

Last but not the least some Jeppiar experiences ...

Once Sir had come late to a college function, by the time he reached, the
function had begun, so he went to the dais, and said, sorry I am late,
because on the way my car hit 2 muttons (Meaning goats).

At Sathyabama college day 2002:

"This college strict u the worry no .... U get good marks, I the happy,
tomorrow u get good job, jpr the happy, tomorrow u marry I the enjoy"

At St. Josephs college of engineering fresh years day 2003:

"No ragging this college. Anybody rag we arrest the police "

VERY IMPORTANT : ok enjoy this English, but dont forget your English !!

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