Wife: Honey..... What are You Looking for ?
Wife: Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour !
Husband: I was just looking for the expiry date.
Q - What is the difference between Mother & Wife ?
A - One woman brings you into this world crying...& the other ensures you
continue to do so.
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?
Wife: Yes and no.
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office.
Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at
your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself,
"What other problem can there be greater than this one?"
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and
lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me
to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my
father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER
WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it! He wants to scare his parents."
Interviewer to Milionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before
you married her?"
Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.
A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me -- my pretty
face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of